Could not think of any title and as I don't really think anyone reads this I am guessing it doesn't really matter.
Ok so I will start with the whole ttc thing, this cycle was/is the fifth one on Clomid since my Bailey was born.
I have been on the same dose of 50mg ever since I was first prescribed it in January 2012, I got pregnant with little April on my third month taking it, but that was our first month we were able to actively try as hubby had been very ill, having been in hospital for 11 days.
I then lost little April at only 5 weeks pregnant, as soon as my next proper cycle started I went back on to the Clomid as advised by the hospital and then conceived my precious rainbow Bailey.
After Bailey died and was born sleeping I still had 2 months left of my 6 month prescription of Clomid, I was then seen by the fertility specialist who prescribed me another 6 months at the same dose as I had responded to it so well before.
But now it is 5 months on and despite doing everything right, we have had no luck so I spoke to the fertility nurse and asked for a blood test to check my progesterone levels to check I am still responding to the treatment.
I got the result of this test last Friday and it was not good news, the fertility nurse said my level was 14 which apparently means i am not responding to it.
So she says whenever my next cycle starts I need to double my dose and take 2 tablets for 5 days which is 100mg a day, I wonder whether this will make those awful side effects I used to get come back.
I then will have to have the blood test done again on cycle day 21 and hope it shows an improvement.
I also went to see my gp finally after trying to ignore feeling so lousy and having weird symptoms for a while, he got me to have a blood test yesterday to check for an under active thyroid if that comes back normal I then need to get more hormone tests as apparently some of the under active thyroid symtoms can also suggest perimenopause, which I can't help but feel would be pretty typical.
On top of all that I am really low and struggling right now, I have felt to tearful and alone most days, I miss my mum so much and am struggling to accept I really am never going to see her again.
Grief is the worst thing in the world, dealing with my dads grief and my poor boys grief is agony.
